Below are the questions that we used for small group last night. It promoted a great discussion about how we as ladies can support and encourage our husbands to become all that God has intended for them to become. (PS. We are going through God, Marriage and Family by Andreas J. Kostenberger.)
- How do you feel about Kostenberger’s definition of a family? “Building on our definition of marriage in the previous chapter as a sacred bond between a man and a woman, instituted by and publicly entered into before God (whether or not this is acknowledged by the married couple), normally consummated by sexual intercourse, we may define “family” as, primarily, one man and one woman united in matrimony (barring death of a spouse) plus (normally) natural or adopted children and, secondarily, any other persons related by blood.
- “[L]ike most Near Eastern cultures, Israelite families were… patriarchal (the father was in charge of the household). Like the spokes of a wheel, family life radiated outward from the father as its center. The community was built around the father and bore his stamp in every respect.”
- What was your father like? Was he a good example of what you want to be like or the kind of man you would want to marry?
- How does his example, good or bad influence your family life/marriage?
- What does respect look like toward your parents today?
- “Block lists the following nine primary responsibilities of the father in ancient Israel:
- Personally modeling strict personal fidelity to Yahweh;
- Leading the family in the national festivals, nurturing the memory of Israel’s salvation;
- instructing the family in the traditions of the exodus and the Scriptures;
- managing the land in accordance with the law (Leviticus 25);
- providing for the family’s basic needs for food, shelter, clothing, and rest;
- defending the household against outside threats (e.g. Judg. 18:21-25)
- serving as elder and representing the household in the official assembly of citizens (Ruth 4:1-11);
- maintaining family members’ well-being and the harmonious operation of the family unit; and
- implementing decisions made at the clan or tribal level.”
How does this translate into the role of a father/husband today?
(Men) How does this affect how you look at your role as a husband/father? What are some practical things that you can start doing in your life to fulfill these responsibilities?
(Women) How does this affect how you view the man in your life? How can you support/encourage (without nagging) your husband to fulfill these responsibilities?
Additional questions… How has your relationship with your parents changed since getting married? How are your in-law relationships? Is there anything that you need to do to repair/show respect in either of these areas?
I hope that this gives you something to chew on!